If “sex” is in the title of a TV show, I am probably going to watch it — and if Michelle Williams is in it, I am definitely going to watch it — but I have some sex-positive friends who nonetheless were turned off by the title of Dying for Sex, thinking it would be [...]
A Dom/sub conversation about subby tears with the most traditional Dom I know … the sub: When it comes to BDSM play such as impact, I have enjoyed a decent pain tolerance, at least if there’s enough of a gradual build for my brain to release all those lovely endorphins that help me along. Once [...]
Back in the 1960s and ‘70s, when the Leather community anchored in San Francisco was pretty much inventing modern BDSM, it was taken for granted that a would-be Dominant would begin training for power exchange by first serving as a submissive to a mentor Dom. After all, how could Dominants learn to control the submissive [...]
How did you first get into BDSM? I was hanging out with a friend of the family, and after having a bit to drink, I went with my gut instinct, and put on music from the The Full Monty and stripped for her. She said, “If this were any other day, I’d slap you so [...]
A Dom and sub walk into a bar ... and have a conversation. Well, okay, we weren’t in a bar, Robert (the Dom) and I (the sub) were in separate cities emailing each other. It is always interesting to look at a power exchange issue from both sides of the D/s slash. Such as a [...]
In my very first BDSM relationship, I was the Dominant. Well, I played the role of Dominant anyway, dressing up in leather, whirling a flogger over my head, giving my masochistic boyfriend frequent beatings … and growing very irritated when he didn’t do what I told him. Aren’t you supposed to be my submissive? I’d [...]
With the thrilling discovery that one enjoys the submission side of BDSM, many an eager sub finds him/herself longing to be “trained” by a Dominant. Lucky for their Doms, manuals on submissive training abound on book-selling sites. Some of these manuals are good, and some are bad (and badly written). Yet, all are incomplete with [...]
If you were to rely on television and film as a guide to how BDSM impacts one’s soul, it wouldn’t be a pretty picture. Kink is used as shorthand for moral downfall, and most every kinky character onscreen is either part of some Satanic cult, or is a sadistic serial killer, or a heartless politician, [...]
The question: Is BDSM and power exchange a sexual orientation in the way that homosexuality or bisexuality clearly is? Or is interest in kink a choice, like one chooses a hobby? The debate on whether BDSM relationships are the result of an orientation or a leisure activity has been going on for more than a [...]
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