The Ten Commandments for Dominas

Most people who give BDSM or the D/s lifestyle a try are exploring non-traditional play as a way to spice up their sex lives, or perhaps learn more about themselves and their desires. While these readers may gain some insights through My missives, in this particular blog post I am writing for those individuals who securely understand their role in the D/s life. There are a number of terms for such a Person:  Natural Dominant, True Dominant, or Authentically Dominant. This post is addressed to the Women who identify as such, but is equally valuable for any Dom in the BDSM community.

When I was actively training Novice Mistresses in the art of Domination, I created a list of Ten Commandments. The list made its way around the fledgling internet at the time, and I have often been asked to resurrect it. It still stands as a solid reminder for Women who choose to take on the responsibility of being a Dominatrix. Please feel free to share it with the Dominant Women you know. Enjoy.

1. You are Goddess, Mistress, Divine Supreme Woman deserving of reverence, adoration, happiness and love.

2. Behave as a Queen, commanding yet benevolent, always mindful that true respect is always earned.

3. Perform Your duties without inflicting real harm and only if they are not contrary to the laws of the Creator.   

4. Never lie, always be faithful to Your word and agreed limits.

5. Teach Your charge with love, guiding him or her towards perfection.

6. Respect weakness and be its defender. Never exploit Your charge’s devotion or feelings.

7. Never engage in play out of anger or retribution. It is not a weapon.

8. Respect privacy and discretion. Never reveal what should not be revealed.

9. Allow Your charge to question your Supremacy. Approve and encourage the homage of reason over that of blindfolded fear.

10. Be true to Yourself and support all Goddesses by being courageous and brave. Do not allow abuse, humiliation or infidelity to plague You. 

Mistress Lila, is a Domme with more that twenty-five years BDSM experience both professionally and personally. She resides in Central California where she offers workshops on the subject, and counsels lifestyle couples.